“Welcome, and congratulations. I am delighted that you could
make it. Getting here wasn’t easy, I know. In fact I suspect it was a little
tougher than you realize.

To begin with, for you to be here
now, trillions of drifting atoms had to somehow assemble in an intricate and
curiously obliging manner to create you. It’s an arrangement so specialized and
particular that it has never been tried before and will only exist this once.
For the next many years (we hope) these tiny particles will uncomplainingly engage
in all the billions of deft, co-cooperative efforts necessary to keep you
intact and let you experience the supremely agreeable but generally under
appreciated state known as existence.” 
– Bill Bryson in A Short History
on Nearly Everything
Standing next to the kettle, I watched the water jump and
bubble and hop through the plastic viewing panel on the side. I blinked calmly
and then proceeded to click down the on-off switch before it automatically
activated itself. Suddenly, over my shoulder I heard a voice pipe up, “Are you
kidding me, Cass?”
“What??” I replied.
“You can’t even let the kettle
decide when it’s ready to be done!?”
… This statement was followed by an onslaught of laughter
from the both of us.
My initial instinct was to brush it off. Besides, what was the
big deal? It’s just a kettle. But as the thoughts bumped around my brain, I
began to wonder if this simple act was more than just an innocent desire to manage
my time … perhaps it was an example of my, occasionally dreadful, impatience or,
an innate in-ability to release control!?
Regardless, the scene struck me as peculiar; the clever
bystander was right to question it.

So … I kept wondering, why did I feel the
need to stop the kettle?

They say, a watched pot never boils, but I beg to differ.
ZOOM OUT


The truth is, stopping the kettle was a subconscious act –
but my best hypothesis is founded in the realm of “controlled chaos”.
Just like any profession, an athlete has routines and
schedules. And while, in past posts, I have explained the (sometimes mundane)
day-to-day – it’s a fact that all too often the scheduling (and intermittent
spurts of dramatic events) barely leaves enough time to exhale. This endless
go-go-go and extremely narrow focal point- is where my mind functions at its
finest. So, just like when I’m hurdling down those icy chutes on my glorified
tea tray at more than 130km per hour … here
is where I am able to organize that chaos.  
Just the same; with all that being said – this small
reflection also forced me to open up the aperture on my lens. During what has
felt like an endless number of summer weeks, squinting at my goals with pinhole
focus, my ability to see the entire picture hasn’t always remained a simple task.

When I checked in last, I was preparing to once again put my
head down and go after this off-season with everything I have.


So what has come across the table?
Well let me lay out yet another delicious menu for you to consider:
– Sport Canada deemed my position within the carding
criteria as an “irregularity” and my attempt at an appeal, invalid; sub
sequentially officially denying me any pre-season/summer carding.
– The 2014/2015 National Skeleton Program – SelectionCriteria and
2014/2015 BCS High Performance Athlete Selection Flowchart were adjusted and finalized.

– Canadian Skeleton continues the search for a Head Coach. (This position should
be announced ANY day *fingers crossed*)
– The Head Coach for the Bobsleigh side is currently pulling double
duty as Bobsleigh Canada Skeleton (BCS)’s interim High Performance Director.
– BCS’s Financial Officer just submitted her official
resignation.  

– But, we did elect a new Board of Directors … well, sort of.


– Additionally, the end of July saw me decide to take my
Strength and Conditioning a different way. As you may know, when I had returned to begin my dry-land
training in May, our program had developed and implemented integrated group training
– to which you were designated by your respective tier.

I spent two months in these sessions (as a Tier 2) and am
grateful for the programming I did receive. But after having been an elite
level athlete for more than just a couple of years, I recognized that for me to take
all my abilities to the next level and beyond, I require more
specific attention to individualized aspects – after all: take extra care of all the smallest
details, and the bigger picture will come together. Thus, I am currently making
gains under the watchful eye of private Strength and Conditioning Coach/ former
Canadian World Cup Bobsleigh Breakman, Rob Gray.

– The official push testing camp came and went. I put everything I could on
the line, and I came up short from the designated time standard (by 0.09) …This
meant that I am no longer even considered Tier 2 and had I remained training
with the National Team Strength and Conditioning Coaches I wouldn’t have been
allowed to continue with them (so thankfully – I had already taken control of
that element). In a turn of events, all Tier 2 athletes who were unable to
reach their respective push standard were invited to push again in the Tier 3
push testing just a short four days later.
I stepped up to the block and chased that clock again. I did manage to shave off some
time but it was still not enough … missing it by 4 one-hundredths of a second.

– Last, but certainly not least, I have been dealing with an extremely stubborn injury
in my right foot. At first, through June and July, it was thought to be a
bruise.

We acted accordingly and I trained through the pain. However,
I was feeling NO relief with taping and ultrasound so after a bone scan (at my
request) it was finally discovered that my calcaneus bone (very edge of the
heel) was swollen from the tendon in my arch repeatedly pulling away at the
insertion point – this pulling and swelling action caused an extra bit of bone to
develop.

This injury is my first chronic injury ever– it is not only
painful, but not an easy fix. That tiny little bone has demanded a great deal
of attention.  Requiring hefty
doses of oral Voltaren, custom orthotics (to be worn as much as possible) and
has kept me from doing ANY sprinting or sled pulling since the diagnosis!

… Not exactly ideal in a year when criteria requires its
best athletes be faster than ever in the first 50 metres.
(WARNING: THE FOLLOWING IS A HARD LINE RANT)


Now, while I have graciously accepted the difficult fact
that once I was no longer a designated Tier 2 athlete, I was also no longer
eligible to access the new Winsport High Performance Centre, nor am I
covered for any treatment from our Integrated Support Team (IST)  – it
was an even tougher pill to swallow when the Team Doctor suggested that I make a formal
request to be allowed to have access to two pieces of equipment (the water treadmill and anti-gravity treadmill) for the
rehabilitation of my heel.


I swallowed my pride and ensured that I went through the proper avenues. I was very grateful that the Canadian Sport Institute’s Head Physiotherapist insisted that we continue along the road to recovery that we had started together. In order to make sure
my appointments took NO time from any other athletes “in the system” we made
sure that my access was only in the early hours of the day and that I worked
with the Interning Physio, so that the Head Physio was always available to patients. 

I was able to attend 4 sessions before literal insult was
added to this injury.

An individual athlete went out of their way to complain
about me being allowed to receive ANY help. This complaint meant that all
support had to stop immediately.


I would just like to formally thank whomever decided that rehab for MY injury was somehow
“unfair” to you and YOUR situation. God forbid you ever have a chronic injury
(and for that matter, if you do – perhaps you could have spoken to me directly
about your concern?!) I would also like to ask you to recognize the reality that
making strides to limit each other
throughout this team (re) building process will benefit no one. No one.
(END RANT)

Yeah, I am frustrated, but more than that – this most recent event left me
disappointed. Needless to say, this off-season has been an exasperating process
– but mark my words – I didn’t, and seriously don’t plan to let up.

Sorry,
haters.


ZOOM OUT

Now then, back to the point – whether or not you decided to click on those
links (above) and read the BCS documents, the Cole’s Notes of the big picture
is still the same: injury or no, push standard or not, considered inside or
outside of the “program”, I am still eligible to earn back a place on the World
Cup Skeleton Team at Canadian Team Selections which will be held the first two
weekends of November right here in Calgary, AB.

I hope you can clear your schedule, grab your cowbells and come be apart of the
action! Stay tuned for more specific
details.

As the highest ranked returning Canadian female Skeleton
Racer and defending Canadian Champion I would like to extend a warm and
heartfelt welcome to every single hurdle that has been/ has yet to be thrown in front of my
path since as far back as December 2013. Some of you may have forgotten – I used
to race hurdles.


Please understand, I do not claim to be perfect and quite honestly, like most of
us, I would often rather be safe and comfortable than walk around being brave and fighting battles. But the reality is – this is my
story; this is my life, and the
adventures and drama can cause it to seem messy and nuanced and sometimes it becomes a moving target, but this is the existence that I am unconditionally grateful for. And while
I’m likely to continue to stop the kettle before it’s “ready” and speak out louder than is
“normal” – these are all instances of a passion, a constant flame. A flame that still
burns inside of me no matter how many big winds threaten to snuff it out.
Because even on the days when that flame dwindles down to
a tiny spark … it’s always enough to keep me going.

Zoom out,