Third-last sled off in the second heat; Bobbhan Winterberg and I were once again clicking.
I flew across the finish line and up the outrun – my heart pounding behind my rib cage. I arched my back and dragged my toes along the short walls to slow down – bouncing and skidding around. But what ended up being slightly more jolting was the instant the race clock came into view and a “5” flashed after my final combined downtime.
A deafening silence filled my ears.
What this meant was that I had just managed to drop four positions, slip out of the medal contention and seriously throw my emotions a curveball. Needless to say, I was extremely glad to have a limo-tinted visor — if only to hide a few choice words.
When I did take my helmet off all I could say was, “Well, that’s not what I expected …” then I turned and smiled big for a photographer who was calling my name.
Regardless of how I felt for a couple hours after the race, these highs and lows truly are an integral part of my individualized experience and ultimate progression. And no, I’m not just saying that ….
A comment was made to me as I was watching the men’s race that reminded me to take a step even further back from this result.
“Your runs were 3rd and then 9th ranked, so you must not only wonder ‘Why didn’t I go fast’ but also ask yourself, ‘Why did I go fast’!”
So while the lists of variables and limitations (both perceived or true) in my sport, at times, feel endless – it remains constant that in order to achieve better and better results I must continue to retain the highest level of perspective possible. I must continue to take everything I do – on and off the ice – to new levels. I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again … it’s about turning all weaknesses into strengths and making the strengths even stronger.
Sometimes you just can’t … yet.
(A related blog entry by my friend and Canadian Heptahlete – Jen Cotton)
The duality of feeling both pride and disappointment is unique. I ask my heart and mind to acknowledge these moments, take whatever I need from them and then … let them go.
Because in reality, this 7th place rank or any other singular moment does not get to define me; it’s my job to write that script.
Next stop – La Plagne, France. A new country and my first new track this season!
It’s not where we stand, but in what direction we are moving. -Goethe
PS – The Winterberg Team Race
After my first ever team event experience, I can honestly say there is nothing quite like the energy created through inter-discipline camaraderie! Canadian Bobsledders and Skeletors racing together and going for the combined time win – it was exactly what I hoped it would be. It was also another chance to “get it right” in Winterberg.
With a little heart, determination and maybe a pinch of fast drive lines – CANADA1 took the GOLD! This meant, my very first World Cup Podium was a first place – and allowed me to stand atop the podium singing ‘Oh Canada’ alongside Kaillie Humphries, Chelsea Valois, Lyndon Rush, Neville Wright and Eric Neilson – loud and proud!